Self love, self compassion, self discipline, they all go hand in hand really. Self love is understanding that maybe my body really needed the extra sleep which is why I didn’t get up at 6 this morning. Self compassion is me saying to myself, this thing happened, I understand, it’s not that big of a deal. But that’s where self discipline comes in and says, actually, it is a big deal. No matter how big or small the action may seem, when you say you’re going to do something and don’t do it, it signals to the brain that you are an unreliable person and cannot be trusted, which chips away at your relationship with self and harms your confidence. You slept in today, it happens, I get it. But what action plan can we come up with together and set in place so that when you make a statement, you keep your word. Maybe you knew last night that you were feeling a little extra tired, in which case you would acknowledge hey, I think I need a little extra sleep tonight, and not set the alarm. There are so many paths we can take to achieve the same outcome, nonetheless the goal has to be truly feeling with your mind, body, heart, and soul, “I trust myself to do what is best for me, I am reliable and capable of doing what needs to be done to continually have a happy and fulfilled life.”
Easier said than done, I know. Most of us have a really fucked up relationship with ourselves that started at a very young age and hasn’t been consciously looked at for years, or maybe even our entire life. But like you’ll see in a lot of my content, I truly believe that the most valuable relationship we’ll have in this life is that with ourselves. If the foundation of our relationship with self isn’t solid, we will catch ourselves constantly seeking happiness and approval from other people, jobs, places, things, and whatever else we can find to distract us from the void that exists within.
If you’ve gotten this far into the writing, that means you care enough to hear more. You have the awareness that this could be you or just that your relationship with self could use some improvement in some way and for that, I give you a round of applause because most people are so scared of what it would even look like for them to search within, that they would rather live in the unconscious pain and void for the rest of their days. Change can be hard, evolution isn’t always rainbows and sunshine. Think about what happens to a seed. A seed is literally planted alone, in the dark. In order to grow, that seed must literally crack itself open and rise to the top in order to see the sun and transform into something COMPLETELY DIFFERENT than what it started with. That sounds like such a crazy process, doesn’t it? You’re going to change, you’re meant to. And it can be such a fucking cool journey man, let me tell you. Challenging at times, sure! But fulfilling in a way that can’t even properly be put into words, and I like to consider myself a pretty damn good writer.
Even on my darkest of days on this side, when it feels so fucking hard and I don’t know how I’m going to make it through, I still feel more fulfilled, more loved, and more capable than I ever did before I got here. The journey isn’t just something you ‘start’ when you feel like it. You’ve been on this journey forever my guy, you just became aware of it, brought it into consciousness, but it was always there. And if that’s the truth, if you’re going to experience ity anyway, wouldn’t you want to do life in the driver’s seat, instead of a random passenger on a random bus going god knows where?
You are so much more capable than you know, so much more worthy than you can currently imagine. There is fucking magic within you and you are doing yourself and the world a disservice when you disregard yourself. You need you.
I believe in you, I love you, we got this. You’re gonna be just fine.